When Caris first told me about her Vulva art project, my whole body became totally activated. I felt aroused and sickened at the same time. And i thought, wow, every woman needs that. But me? No, not me. I couldn’t do that.
Then she told me that she was making an oracle deck and needed more vulvas for the deck and if I bought one, the money would support her to publish the deck. So, now that getting my vulva drawn and painted was not just for me, it would help her; now I could allow myself to do it.
I was so aroused by the thought of having my vulva out in public. Even though no one would know that it was mine, the thought turned me on so much.
When she painted it and gave it to me, I was again, sickened and aroused.
I believe the reason I was sickened was because of the shame that I carry around my vulva. Even though no one directly told me that my sex or sex organs were dirty, this was a very sneaky subconscious belief which I have had to do a lot of work around releasing.
A woman’s most sacred power is in her sexuality, and so to imbue her with the belief that it is somehow dirty is one of the strongest attacks against womanhood and female power.
As I looked at my vulva art, I knew that I had done something radical and deeply sacred.
And that yes, participating in this project was always going to help more women than just me. Because by allowing my beauty to be seen would help so many woman to also see their own beauty. My labia are asymmetrical and I when I was a teen ager I thought that this meant there was something wrong with me, I now know this is completely norma. And its beautiful!
I hope that women every where will be able to see a variety of vulvas and be able to feel good about their vulvas.