Inspiring freedom through authentic creative expression
I am a Creative Arts Therapist (psychotherapist) and Professional Development Coach. I help people remember their true-selves and gifts by helping them believe and celebrate all that they are, so they can create the life they desire. I do this with a powerful combination of creative arts therapy, channelled energy and bodywork, intuitive reading and kinaesthetic coaching, to help them remove energetic blocks, reconnect to their true nature, reclaim their latent gifts and embody their higher self.
I’m originally from the tiny rural town, Northcliffe, Australia; where I whispered to the faeries in the bush, made them homes and listened to their whispers back. I climbed out my window at night to visit the animals on our property and talk to God and the stars – the energy within me. I saw otherworldly beings and communicated with the elements. It was scary but fun as I learnt and soaked up the love from the land. I coloured and created all the time and sometimes all day, nonstop. I was in the element of creativity and free in my childlike state. We would go to the ocean and I played in the turquoise pools and was at awe with its power and beauty, which has not left me to this day.
The dream was changed when we disconnected from the muddy bum naked freedom of our bush property to emerge into the social construct of a larger seaside town and its schools. When I was 5 we moved to Albany, where it was the norm to settle into a job, get married and have a house in your early 20’s.
Having experienced sexual abuse at a young age, parenting myself, dealing with violence and the sickness of a parent, bullying, and struggling to process my emotions, I was a submissive and people pleaser, I constantly sought validation from outside myself and often felt unaccepted and lost. Now I realise this is one of my main limiting beliefs – Don’t shine too bright, it will make others uncomfortable and it shows them that you don’t accept them. So instead I didn’t accept myself to allow for others to feel comfortable. Also I felt the more I showed myself the less others will like me. As I got older these beliefs led me to develop an eating disorder, alcoholism, and have a need to be validated by men, along with a myriad of physical health problems.
At 16 I moved overseas and my world opened as I felt more and more of a misfit. This is when I also broke my back for the first time (without knowing it). I was so submissive, I learnt to deal with and manage the pain. I returned feeling unique and lost. I slotted back into the social construct of society, studied and had multiple jobs to support my degree. I was out drinking 5 days a week if not every weekend to null the nightmares I constantly had, and to numb the deep physical and emotional pain, but I had seen from my travels and always knew there was more for me in life. I always knew I wanted to be a creative, make art and help people. I was super passionate about human behaviour and languages. I yearned to work in my passion no matter how unrealistic or difficult it seemed. I always knew that helping people and living a life of freedom was what I wanted from life.
It was at least two years from breaking my back that I found out I had broken it. I continued to struggle with pain for 5 years after. I was taught to “be quiet” and keep going. I was in so much pain and immobility I started to loath my body even more. I started to try as many different therapies as I could outside of GP – chiropractors, osteopath, Physiotherapy, Reiki, Vipassana, Dieticians. All of these worked but I was still in pain and feeling unhealthy, unfit and depressed. Along with many digestive issues and medication prescriptions, which made me increasingly sick. I tried to make myself feel better, the only way I thought I could, but this only made me feel worse. I was constantly giving my power away through saying yes to people, drinking too much and having sex with people who had no respect for me. I was completely disconnected from my body and I had no self respect, acceptance, or idea how much of an impact this was having on my mental and physical health.
I saw I had a disorganised work life, shallow relationships and, I was reluctant to see and scared of my family. My relationship with food, alcohol and men reflected my relationship with myself. From my early teens I suffered with endometriosis, having been on the pill since I was 17, I was constantly on and off antibiotics to try and heal my skin, decrease the pain and combat reoccurring tonsillitis and glandular fever, which would then flare up as soon as I stopped taking the antibiotics. At the time I was unaware of how numb the pill made me feel, and how much damage the antibiotics where on my body. I felt exhausted all of the time, and I struggled to feel connected to my body. My skin, endometriosis pain, back issues, plus my constant loathing for my body meant that being drunk was the only time I felt I could feel free, I would then crave attention from men to make me feel worthy.
It was 2010 when I had a wake up call. I was in a stressful and horrific job where I was being sexually assaulted, bullied and working over 13 hr days. I tried to go through the official process to report my problems but realised this was the industry – the system was fine, I just didn’t fit the system. I went for a run for miles!! and realised that was it! I’m not putting up with this. I quit that next morning and applied to study language education. The art of communication. That was my first time I realised I don’t have to be in this sucky job and I can do what I want! But wow that was scary! at that time I started my own art business with the intention to make others feel seen, heard and connected, sharing the healing power of art. My choices were driven by that innate desire to feel at home and be accepted.
It was later that year a beautiful soul witnessed me being in a pattern of victimisation within my family dynamic and prompted and encouraged me to step away from this. She validated my feelings and that I wasn’t crazy. Gas lighting had been happening for the past 20 years so it was normalised to me. To be abused and bullied and the scape goat – and take it. And if I spoke up or acted out of line was abused more heavily. So I learnt yes it’s way better and easier to just hide or submit. This friend recommended to me a life coach and a kinesiologist.
This one session with the amazing life coach and spiritual guide changed my life. I also still see my kinesiologist to this day. From those two sessions, they activated a part of me to see my latent gifts and remembrance of self – my love and understanding of the body soul connection came back. I was intrigued, what is this witchy witchcraft amazingness. I was healing my body through the subconscious, my back pain and immobility was healing. I was reigniting my inner self that had been put in a box and buried for so long.
I had never experienced this kind of perspective or healing before. The experience of seeing a therapist who saw me changed how I viewed life forever. It made me realise how much joy you could experience in life by reaching out and receiving. Not being scared of being alive! I knew I had to heal my body and remember who I was. After trying to numb my life, I realised I needed to heal my traumas and body and uncover my true essence to feel free and create the life of my dreams – creating.
From this session I started my self development journey, I journaled daily and read books about healing your life. This helped me overcome my anxiety and panic attacks and bring more joy into my life. I went on to completing the language degree and teaching thousands of students, refugee children, kids at risk, I loved my job. But I was still disconnected from my body, in that I hadn’t healed any of my past traumas and was spiritually bypassing a lot of what I needed to heal. I was eating well, meditating, exercising, and journaling, but I would still go out and get drunk and over work myself and have poor boundaries. I was aware of the mind, body, soul connection at this point but I was still giving away my power, saying yes to things when I should have been saying no, trying to get validation from people who didn’t even respect me and needing to please people.
A year or so later I realised there was that one thing that was missing – hands on creativity – outside the system. I wanted to do something that brought all my loves together; communication, empowerment, rites of passage, trauma therapy and creating from the heart – channelling. That’s when in 2013 I found it – Arts Therapy.
It took me a while to apply and bring myself to start studying again. Could I study when it felt so late in life? A four year degree in my late 20’s, when I just wanted to create and teach positive communication and kinesthetics now and the power it brings to your life. Because I was still acting out old stories, I was still replaying experiences from my past that were screaming to be healed. This led to a break-in and sexual assault which on the day I pressed charges I contracted Ross River Virus (mosquito virus) which had me bedridden for over a year and with no immune health and energy for 3 years as the virus remained active. The man was charged and pleaded guilty, but the stress and toll the case took on my mental and emotional let alone my spiritual and physical well being was massive.
I’m so glad I enrolled as Arts Therapy broke all systems that where taught to me, It deinstitutionalised me and allowed me to crack open and see a bit more of me from an experiential perspective. I rolled around and crawled along the floors – feeling their textures and listening. I played, connected and created. A relationship was growing with all that around me as I came more into my body. I was revisiting my child-self in that bush setting. It’s one thing to learn something and it’s another to experience it. It gave me power to over come Ross River and I moved to Australia’s north west where I was faced with all of my past traumas which I had the choice to heal or repress further.
I started creating, I started listening to my body, I started to connect back to nature and the elements. I understood the importance of unearthing all of my repressed emotions, bringing my old stories to light and rewriting them, taking my pleasure and my desires into my own hands I reclaimed my sexual and shadow self and transformed my pain into power. I stopped drinking as an escape, I stopped having sex with people who didn’t respect me and I am stepping fully into my divine feminine energy. I met many more mentors, sisters and brothers and I realised how much being on the pill during my teens had numbed all of my emotions and I started to enjoy feeling into everything so deeply, I started to see how I had been repressing so much and how much wisdom was held within me. I committed to loving myself, putting myself first and living my truth. I also committed to creating and healing my cycle which had been a source of great pain and stifled creativity. I fell completely in love with my body, my life and everything I was doing. This led me to being magnetic to the life of my dreams. Now living in Bali whilst helping others heal and transform their lives too.
Through reconnecting to their innate gifts and abilities, unlocking the healing power of creativity, letting go of shame and guilt around who they are, doing the deeper levels of healing, and much more, I help people reconnect to who they truly are, heal from their past, reclaim their lives and become a magnet to the relationships, goals, and life they truly desire.
If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to get in touch. I would love to connect.